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YOU'RE the chiclet, not me!

Caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw!

BY BOB LOBLAW Jan 1, 2020

You're losing blood, aren't you? Probably, my socks are wet. Caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw. Well excuse me for liking the way they frame my junk! She wanted to look 48. I nearly airbrushed her into oblivion. Ended up checking "albino" on the form. Say something that will terrify me. Lindsay: F*** me. Tobias: No, that didn't do it. I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run..so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.

Daddy horny, Michael. There's a girl in my soup! Te quiero. English, please. I love you! Great, now I'm late. The Army had half a day. She calls it a mayonegg. What, so the guy we are meeting with can't even grow his own hair? COME ON!


Suit, $3,000.
Photographed by COME ON!

Teamocil. Go ahead, touch the Cornballer. She calls it a Mayonegg. It's a wonderful restaurant! You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent.

My brother wasn't optimistic it could be done, but I didn't take "wasn't optimistic it could be done" for an answer. Sorry, some of my students are arguing the significance of the shankbone on the seder plate. But we do not - NOT wag our genitals at one another to make a point. Never once touched my per diem. I'd go to Craft Service, get some raw veggies, bacon, Cup-A-Soup…baby, I got a stew goin'. I figured out a way to make money while I'm working! Bob Loblaw Lobs Law Bomb.


She wanted to look 48. I nearly airbrushed her into oblivion. Ended up checking "albino" on the form.

A million [bleep]ing diamonds! Oh…yeah…the guy in the $4,000 suit is holding the elevator for a guy who doesn't make that in three months. Come on! You can control your bladder when you're dead! What's next, Michael? Are you going to make dancing illegal? Is this the tiny town from Footloose? I call it Tricks –- wait for it – Around The Office. I'm not a prostitute. Then I shall let you live! Those are balls.


Suit, $4,000.
Photographed by COME ON!

The only person that gets Lucille this excited is Gene. OH MY GOD, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE… sale. Oh, the burning! ♪♪ Amaaaaaaziiiing Graaaace ♪♪ I just haven't had sex in a month. You know, you've been here two months. It's hard to gauge time. She tried pesto for the first time. Imagine that, 92 years old and she never tried pesto. One for the ladies. It looks like you've been looking for dragons… in the future. That was Tom Cruise, the actor. They said he was some kind of scientist. I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.


Banana Suit, $600.
Photographed by COME ON!

Second-of-ly, I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh I'm sorry, I forgot, your wife is dead. No, she's in it. She's a contestant. It's sorta like an inner beauty pageant. Ah, there it is. I run a pretty tight ship around here. With a pool table. Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold necklaces with the T on it? That's a cross. Across from where?


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